It seems to be that many of the stories of “ex-otherkin” begin with the person finding the otherkin community (or just a IRL otherkin) and THEN “becoming” otherkin/therian. I’m not surprised. I’ve seen people join on therian boards who hear about the concept of therianthropy and then “realise” that they are non-human but unsure of what species. They then ask the community for help for finding their theriotype. This has always struck me as very backwards.
For me, therianthropy is such a strong feeling that if you have no clue what so ever about what species you are, you probably aren’t a therian. It’s like on a facebook theran group (which can be horribly fluffy), a teenage boy claimed to first be wolf (because his friend told him he looked like one), then otter, then penguin. These creatures are very different from each other. How could one mistake one for another? Oh, and why was he a penguin? “Because I like the cold”. -_- He very quickly absorbed this penguin identity, such as being very active on the facebook group and changing his facebook profile picture into a penguin. This, even though many of us others told him “there is no hurry, it’s all right to be human, you have to be sure of these things” etc.
I would not be surprised if he would post an “ex-otherkin” confession online, saying that therianthropy is just advanced escapism and that there is no productivity in the otherkin community.
I, on the other hand, knew that I felt like a wolf long before I found the therian community. I had this desperate search for others who felt like me. But when I found the therian community, I read about their problems with fluffies and people jumping to conclusions, so I didn’t register on any therian forums for 2 years. But I did call myself a therian, since it did describe my experiences better than calling myself a werewolf. I have since doubted whether I am a wolf, coyote or a hybrid between these two, but they are at least similar creatures.
I am sorry if I come off as elitist or something. But I’ve seen people latch on to something that seems cool but is wrong for them before. I’ve seen straight people calling themselves bi (because bisexuality is “more romantic”??), and then, because they faked, make people assume all bisexuals are fakers. I’ve seen people self-harm “because it’s edgy”, making those who actually have trouble with self destructibility seem like trend followers. I know how hurtful this is.
It’s like I can imagine that there really are some people who have multiple personalities, but it seems to me that most I read about on the internet aren’t. In the same way, I am sure that therians exist, but that many who pass through the therian community are wishkin.
Also, I’ve noticed that some of those “ex-otherkin” say that what they thought were animal behaviours were actually just normal human behaviours. I can understand this in some ways: of course humans can prefer one food type over another, or have some certain personality traits. But I need a way of describing those things that aren’t typically human. It’s not a normal part of being human to want to have pups instead of children, finding humans ugly, to walk on all fours, to feel an intense urge to howl, to play bow or to wanting to tear a moose calf to pieces and eat it. Calling myself a wolf therian gives me a way of describing my experience: experiences that I had before I knew about the word.
Oh, and by the way, I live a productive and healthy life: studying full-time, working part-time, friends, boyfriend, active in a religious community and exercise. I trust the psychologists I’ve talked to several times better on my mental health than some random strangers on the internet.
But to those of you who somehow got into the otherkin community by mistake and now live another life and are happier: good for you. I would say you know what’s best for yourself.
Seriously, I think fluffbunnies are one of my biggest pet peeves. I have zero tolerance for them, and if they don’t admit to being roleplayers and are just screwing around, if they truly want others to believe their crap, I make it my personal agenda to uncover them.
Yeah, maybe I’m a bit cruel with how I publicly embarrass people. But if they aren’t willing to be honest with everyone and themselves that they’re not as “great” as they think they are, then I don’t care how mean it is, I will take them down a peg or two.
I do not tolerate nor respect those who go on power trips. I’ve been down that path before, and I hated myself for it. I now have a personal vendetta for anyone who thinks they’re better than everyone else. :P